The Rise and Fall of Corby Caledonian
Introduction
Corby, a town living in the shadow of its past. A once proud industrial suburb in the landscape of the ‘rose of the shires', Northamptonshire. One of the original New Towns to emerge in the wake of the second world war when Great Britain was a land of bombed out cities. The ‘father’ of the British New Town movement was Ebenezer Howard, who’s book ‘Garden Cities of Tomorrow’ and his creation of garden cities Letchworth and Welwyn were a source of inspiration for planners, legislators and politicians involved in the New Town initiative. In October 1945, Lord Reith was appointed chairman of a New Towns Committee which concluded that New Towns were best created by government sponsored development corporations financed by the exchequer. The New Towns Act of 1946 was immediately put into use with the designation of Stevenage as the first New Town. Eleven others followed between 1946 and 1955, eight were London ‘overspill’ towns and were welcomed by the London County Council. A number were built for reasons other than city overspill. Aycliffe (1947) and Corby (1950) were designated to provide better quality housing for existing employment areas. Peterlee (1948) was intended to provide an urban centre and alternative employment options for a mining area.
Corby was but a village until the Stewarts and Lloyds steelworks arrived in the 1930s. Awash with a variety of cosmopolitan peoples, many steelworkers were young and in the springtime of their life. If attitudes, religions and cultures differed, one common denominator was sport, and in particular, football. Across the great divide, sport was a bridge. Stewarts and Lloyds offered opportunities for all sportsmen, indeed encouraged them, rugby and bowls sections were prominent but football was the main interest. In the immediate post war years, football was booming with attendances at matches hitting an all time high. Television, in its infancy wasn't a distraction. Followers of the game could catch brief glimpses of important games at the cinema, thanks to Pathe News. The World Cup which had started in 1930 only began to take shape when the Home Countries deigned to participate in the 1950 competition. The European Cup was still but a dream. In Britain, the greatest competition of them all was the F.A.Cup. A prize more yearned for than even the League Championship. Glory was to be found in the ‘Cup'. From the giant killing exploits in the early rounds through to the showpiece at Wembley Stadium. Wembley. Every schoolboy's dream. To walk out in an F.A.Cup Final on a sun drenched Saturday afternoon in May. The climax of the football season. The pinnacle of many a footballers' career.
A dream beyond the realms of possibility to millions. Certainly those of 'local' amateur football leagues.
Corby Town F.C. were formed in 1948 and are acknowledged as the senior club in the town, but it was the original works team of Stewarts & Lloyds that put the town, or village as it was, on the map. A side made up mainly of Scots from the Lanarkshire and Glasgow areas, brought south by the prospects of a ‘better life.’
Prior to Stewarts and Lloyds F.C. the earliest record of a football team in Corby is one that took part in the Kettering Combination North Section at the turn of the twentieth century, doing combat with Ringstead, Desborough Reserves, Kettering United, Geddington Reserves and Thrapston.
Nationally, a look at the football results for December 30th 1899 reveal a First Division boasting such names as Newton Heath, Small Heath, New Brighton Tower, Accrington Stanley. Names of legend. The F.A.Cup which was inaugurated in 1871 had by the turn of the century steadily built a reputation for thrilling and tense encounters. Early victors were The Royal Engineers, The Wanderers, a London side who were the Real Madrid of the day, winning six of the first 9 competitions. Other victors in those early years included Oxford University, Blackburn Rovers, Preston North End and Aston Villa. The Cup finals were played at Crystal Palace, Fallowfield and later Stamford Bridge. Wembley was no where to be seen.
Fast forward a century. If anyone had ventured to suggest to Joey Martin, the centre forward of Corby Caledonian’s Sunday League team that he might one day play against another pub team, in a cup final at the world famous Wembley Stadium, he would probably have responded with, “you been drinkin’? playing for the Caley at Wembley! You're aff yer heed!”
Fiction maybe, but in 1995 the dream became reality for Joey, thanks to Carlsberg Breweries who had introduced the Carlsberg Pub and Club Cup for the nation’s drinking holes.
The Orange and the Green
The ‘Caley’, otherwise known as the Corby Caledonian Club was a nondescript back street hive who's only previous claim to fame was it once housed the Corby branch of the Loyal Orange Lodge. A relic of a byegone age when the Stewarts and Lloyds steelworks was at it's peak and embracing all colours and creed. The rich religious fervour inherent in the town was borne out of the conflicting passions of Irish and Scottish immigrants. Graffiti adorned many a wall around the steelworks during the 50s, 60s and 70s. FKB and FTP provoking much debate and furore. ‘Boyne 1690’ was another favourite. To the ignorant or those who couldn't care less, they were a source of much amusement. What was the relevance of King Billy and the Pope? The Orange and the Green? The Battle of the Boyne? Occasionally some wit would add ‘Hastings 1066’ or ‘Naseby 1645’ to the walls of fame, just to add some confusion. OK, I own up, it was me. Couldn’t resist it!
The Orange Hall in Darleydale Road was the home of the local branch of the Orange Order, a Protestant Religious Organisation which celebrated the seventeenth century democratic revolution in Britain, pioneered by King William III of the Netherlands. King Billy led the fight against the catholic King James and took the throne when James was defeated at the Battle of the Boyne in Ireland in 1690. Annual parades around the country celebrate the victory on the 12th of July. In 1957 Loyalists and flute bands proudly marched out of the Orange Hall in Darleydale Road to begin their inaugural commemoration parade around the town by heading down Studfall Avenue.
Writing on the internet, an anonymous ‘Andy’ posted his experiences of the affiliation of Corby’s Orangemen and Ulster.
‘One of the unexpected joys of being an Orangeman in England is going on parades and seeing different parts of the country where Orangemen are present. Corby was a fascinating example - it is really not part of England at all, but a "Glasgow in the Midlands", populated by ex-steelworkers who came to work in the town. The atmosphere was entirely different from parading say, in Essex or Portsmouth, where the public reaction is one of bewilderment. Here we had cheerers waving Ulster flags ,as well, it must be said, at one point being confronted by the scowling hate-filled countenances of rough - looking men outside a pub where eggs had been disgracefully thrown at a ladies Lodge parade the day before. (This was undoubtedly the Rockingham Arms.)The parade starts off, headed by the Corby Purple Star flute band, resplendent in their blue uniforms and berets. They set off leading the parade followed by the ladies and junior lodges...behind are the men lodges, consisting first of all of the first Corby lodge...the banner carriers have an eccentric way of hopping and skipping from side to side along the parade route.’
By the mid 60s the Corby parade had grown immensely with flute bands from around the country congregating on Studfall Green, opposite the ‘Rock’ which was cause for a lot of belligerent excitement. To put it politely.
It is somewhat an ironic twist of fate that forty years on from that July 12th day in 1957, a soccer team consisting mainly of players who were of the opposite persuasion, and draped in the colour of green, the colours of Glasgow Celtic, would likewise be beating the drum from the former Orange Hall premises as they marched out to begin their own memorable journey - to Wembley Stadium!
During the summer of 1996 a leaflet arrived through the post at the Caledonian Club and nestled with the rest of the junk mail, most of which would be consigned to the waste bin. It was a pamphlet promoting a football tournament and inviting all pub and social clubs to enter a team for a national competition sponsored by Carlsberg Breweries. An attractive incentive was the semi finals being played at the home of Liverpool Football Club, Anfield. The final was to be played at Wembley.
By 1997 the Carlsberg Pub Cup was 'probably' (to coin a phrase from their advertising slogan), the fastest growing cup competition in Britain with 248 teams competing in preliminary regional rounds. To qualify for entry the club’s football team had to have a ground that was fenced in, which presented a problem for Caledonian who played their home matches in the town’s West Glebe public park.
Searching for an alternative, Corby Town's ground at the Rockingham Triangle was considered and rejected due to the athletics track that enclosed the pitch. As manager John Martin explained; “There was a complete lack of atmosphere at the Triangle with the fans too far away from the pitch. We wanted a park where if we had a decent run and we attracted a few fans to support us, they'd be right on top of the game. Stewarts & Lloyds F. C. were thus approached to see if they would allow us to play our home ties on their Occupation Road Welfare Ground. The S & L committee agreed - and secured themselves an unexpected bonus through the bar takings later in the season!”
Corby Caledonian Football Club was formed in 1995 mainly through the efforts of social club members Andy MacFarlane and Dave Erwin. Their first move was to approach John Martin, a former United Counties League player with Desborough and Cottingham and persuade him to become manager. Martin was ideal, a veteran of the local leagues with an encyclopedic knowledge of all the local soccer players. Martin's task of assembling his team was fairly straight forward. The core of the team was already playing for the Caley’s Saturday Northants Alliance team, Corby Strip Mills FC. Their name derived from connections with the derelict steelworks' Rolling Mills plant.
Backed by an enthusiastic committee, Caledonian FC was successful in their application for membership, albeit on a provisional basis, to the Kettering and District Sunday League. To their delight, the obligatory two year qualification period, 'a stipulation to see whether a football club would last', was waived when fellow Corby side, Baltimore Oil went down the pan.
With a sprinkling of former semi professional footballers, the 'Caley' proved too hot for most of the mediocre opposition and were crowned champions in their first season, which was either testimony to John Martin's coaching skills, or a reflection on how inept the Kettering Sunday League was.
Kenny Hughes and John Crawley, both Corby Town/Glasgow Celtic supporters were 'regulars' in the Caley bar and gave unstinting support to the Caley football team on their travels around the county. The sight of Kenny and John, nicknamed ‘Saint and Greavsie, with Celtic scarves dangling around their necks, still jolly from the night before, with carrier bags of ale, shouting obscenities from the touchline to unsuspecting Sunday morning 'footie' participants was heartwarming to the Corby side. And disconcerting for the opposition. 'Get into these sheep shaggers!' often unappreciated around the shire.
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| JC entertaining the troops in the Rock |
‘Things can only get better…’ 1997 and all that.
1997 was the 40th anniversary of the Orange Hall. It was also the year of Princess Diana’s fatal Parissiene road accident. The year when the UK handed sovereignty of Hong Kong over to China. The year when saxophonist Bill Clinton began his second term in office as President of the United States. The year when ‘Titanic’ was released to set sail for Oscar domination. When television became obsessed with the Louise Woodward and O J Simpson murder trials in America. Woodward, a young British au pair, accused of shaking to death an eight month old child she was babysitting in Massachusettes. Simpson an American football star with the Buffalo Bills and actor in the films ‘Naked Gun’ and ‘The Klansman’ accused of the deaths of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman. Woodward was found guilty of second degree murder, later reduced to involuntary manslaughter and freed to return to England. OJ's charge was downgraded to 'civilly liable for the deaths of', and ordered to pay $35,000,000 in damages to the families of both victims.
The curtain also came down on the Conservative government, bringing an end to 18 years of Thatcherism, Majorism and Hagueism. Labour resumed control under Tony Blair, ushering in a new era singing with gusto their adopted anthem, ‘Things can only get better’, a tedious hit for a band named D-Ream. Bland would be an understatement. The sight of old seadog John Prescott elected as second in command to Blair on the Goodship Labour, droning along with fixed smile, remains an indelible memory. Not by any stretch of imagination was Prescott a choir boy.
In Corby, trade unions held a May Day rally and a carnival style march on Saturday May 3rd, celebrating 60 years of the town's Trade Council. The Delta Dixieland Jazz Band led the way with newly elected Corby MP Phil Hope joining the throng, grasping the opportunity to introduce himself. Phil was accompanied by Kettering representative Phil Sawford. The rally, held in the Civic Festival Hall, was boosted by the presence of a number of prominent trade unionists. Transport and General Workers Leader Jimmy Knapp, Fire Services Leader Ken Cameron, General and Municipal President Mary Turner. Trades Council chairman Sean Kettle was beaming; “After 18 years of anti union legislation under the Tories, this rally shows we are still a force to be recognised with. It's great to be celebrating Labour Day under a new Labour Government.”
Amidst the delirium, another cause for major celebration was the success of Corby Caledonian F.C. Barely in existence two years and on their way to Wembley. The ‘Caley' had battled their way through the series of rounds in the Carlsberg Pub Cup to tread the famous turf and do battle with Merseyside team Paulton Victoria Social Club fromThe Wirral.
Few could have dreamt where this was all going to lead when the draw for the first preliminary round was made. The Caledonian were given a home tie against Kettering Social Club but before a ball was kicked, the Kettering side withdrew from the competition to give the ‘Caley’ a bye.
The second preliminary round draw saw the Caley matched with another Kettering side, Fayresport. They too withdrew and the Caledonian suddenly found themselves in the first round proper without kicking a ball in anger.
Their participation in the competition finally got under way with an away tie in Leicestershire against a Coalville side, United Collieries. John Martin recalled; “We took two coach loads of supporters with us, which was amazing really but I guess it was a good excuse for a day out and a crack. It was a horrible day, dull and wet, yet when we went 2-0 up with goals from Jamie Gilsenan and Joey Martin they all started singing, ‘Que Se Ra Se Ra, we’re on our way to Wembley’ and dancing the conga around the pitch under golfing umbrellas. What a laugh, it never entered our heads that we would actually be at Wembley come the end of the season! Graeme Archer scored a third goal to seal our passage and spark off celebrations in Coalville’s clubhouse after the game. We drank the place dry before coming home!”
The White Lion, Eynesbury at home were the next opposition. The first game played on the borrowed Welfare ground. All three Martins, John, Joey and their dad Joe, along with Andy MacFarlane, showed a streak of professionalism by going on a spying mission to Eynesbury the week before the tie to suss the Lions out. “It was well worth it” claimed John, “we could see what their strengths and weaknesses were and discussed what to do about it on the way home.”
News of Caley’s exploits was beginning to get around and the game attracted well over 200 supporters, twice as many as what the town's senior team, Corby Town were averaging at the time. They weren't disappointed as goals from Gilsenan, Ian Jaffrey and Fran O'Connor saw them through to the next round with ease, 3-0.
Luck of the draw saw Caley at home again for the third round tie against The Chestnut Tree from Tilbury. The local media was now beginning to take an interest and the crowd was doubled again, an estimated three to four hundred turned up for the Sunday afternoon fixture. The Tilbury side, slightly taken aback by the home support, dug in and ground out a 1-1 draw (Gilsenan scoring Caley’s goal), to take the game into extra time. The stalemate continued until the end of 120 minutes which meant a penalty shoot out much to the delight of the fans, if not the players. Caley held there nerve and thanks to some heroics from keeper Tam Ferns, they went through to the quarter finals 4-2, and another home tie, against Gloucestershire side Mangotsfield Town Social Club, who had for some reason fancied themselves as favourites to lift the cup, probably because they included half a dozen semi professional players in their side. Manager John Martin was worried. Watching them warm up before the kick off, he recalled; “One guy scared us stiff, he was an ex Arsenal apprentice and looked it. Keeping the ball up and and doing tricks, we wondered what the hell we were we up against.”
Mangotsfield were also receiving specialist coaching from former Liverpool and Republic of Ireland international Mark Lawrenson who had connections with Corby having been a star of the Steelmen’s Beazer Homes League promotion winning team in the early 1990s. ‘Lawro’, brought to Corby by ambitious chairman Bip Wetherell was a big favourite with Steelmen fans, delighted at having such an icon in their side. John Crawley, who travelled the length and breadth of the country with his pal Kenny Hughes supporting the Steelmen, recalls meeting Lawrenson in a London club’s bar some time after he’d hung up his boots and gone on to prominence as a TV football punter. John greeted him, “I remember you!” Lawro, looking smug, expected John to follow up with plaudits as a legendary Liverpool and Ireland defender. Not at all! “You were a great Corby Town player!” John told him.
Northants TV had now joined the bandwagon after picking up on the story of Caledonians success and sent a crew over to film the match. They were probably as surprised as what the Mangotsfield team had been when they arrived at the Welfare. A crowd of over a thousand had spilled out of the pubs and bars to give Caley their support. The Scottish flavour evident with rampant lion flags and kilts giving the afternoon some real colour. “The Gloucestershire boys looked frightened to death when they stepped off their bus,” said John Martin, “they thought Corby was just a wee village and wondered what was going on with all the Scottish accents and colourful language!”
Mangotsfield, it was discovered, had sent scouts to watch the Caley/Chestnut Tree game and they had gone away largely unimpressed. Such was their confidence, they had already booked their London hotel for the final! Whether the Corby boys had heard this prior to the game or not, the game proved to be another marathon affair which went to penalties after extra time had failed to separate the teams with the score 2-2, Archer and Jaffrey the Caley’s scorers. It took twenty minutes to clear the pitch of excited, inebriated fans before they could start the shoot out. Packed behind the goal, they erupted every time a Caley shot went in and the Gloucestershire side missed. With goalkeeper Tam Ferns in belligerent form, egging the support on with his antics, the Mangotsfield boys crumbled under the pressure and failed with four of their five kicks. Caley scored four and a dream semi final at Anfield, Liverpool was achieved.
Poulton Vics meanwhile were making their own way to Anfield having disposed of pubs and clubs from around the country with such names as Temple Inn 10 -1, Stonemasons 6-2, Railway 3-1, St Aloyious 2-0, Ship Launch from Ipswich 2-1 and St Austell 1-0. (Definitions of where the clubs came from are sketchy).
They would meet Hampshire side Eastleigh Social Club in the other semi final.
Meantime, in April, and nothing to do with football, a sighting of what was believed to be a black panther was reported by two Kettering men, driving home from Corby, “It was ever so big and really black” they revealed. The ‘panther’ had been rumoured for months, if not years. roaming around the local countryside. Scepticism about the cat was best expressed by John Crawley’s put down, echoing that of Ricky Tomlinson’s TV Jim Royle's character, “Black panther, my arse!” The only cat worth talking about was Caledonian’s goalkeeper Tam Ferns, nicknamed ‘Cat’ due to his heroics in the Caley goal!
Prior to the semi final with Barnsley’s Butcher’s Arms the Caley squad travelled to St. Helens where they were booked in for an overnight stay at the Stakis Hotel, courtesy of Carlsberg who sponsored the bill of £500. They enjoyed themselves that much, they booked an extra night at their own expense, despite the cost of a further £250!
The profile of the game was emphasised by the media coverage which now included the BBC North West news team seeking out a reluctant John Martin before the game; “I hadn't really expected this, when the cameras and microphones were thrust in your face, and you're not used to this sort of thing, it can be an ordeal. I couldn't get any words out! My tongue dried up. Northants TV were also there and wanted a comment. Radio Talk Sport, BBC Five Live. It was unreal. Funny thing though, I soon got used to it and by the time Sunday came around, I could have read the news!”
As the 12.30 kick off grew nearer John Martin was getting worried; “Both teams were warming up on the pitch, the tension was rising and it was an eerie experience with the ground being empty. I was thinking to myself, ‘where are all the fans?’ I should have realised. Of course they were still in the pubs. Suddenly, I heard singing, steadily getting louder, building to a crescendo. ‘One Caledonian, there's only one Caledonian.’ In came the troops, led by Mick King. It was like something out of the film Zulu! Brilliant! The locals must have thought Scotland were playing, kilts were everywhere. Thirty two stewards were on guard for the games, they couldn’t believe the Caley support. “What part of Scotland are you lot from?” one of them asked, “Liverpool’s fans are famous, but this takes some beating.”
John Martin, seeking inspiration, touched the sign in the tunnel leading on to the pitch ‘This Is Anfield’, and told the players, ‘they’ll name streets after you!’
Like most of the teams that entered this competition, the Butchers had a number of semi pro footballers in their side and in the opening stages of the semi final were comfortably the better team. In the seventh minute, an innocuous cross into the Caley penalty area was inexplicably handled by Ian Jaffrey. “It was pure nerves” John Martin said in his defence, “and as it happened, it didn’t matter as the guy who stepped up to take the penalty was just as nervous and his shot hit the post!”
In a close game it was the Butchers who scored first, in the 65th minute when Darren Field found the back of the Caley net from 25 yards. John Martin was disheartened. Sitting in the dugout he had all but given up hope, time was running out, but he admitted, “the fans kept us going”. Then out of the blue a lifeline came following a surge upfield and cross into the box by Gary Thomas who had clearly picked up on the advice from the Caley supporters behind the goal. A lone voice bellowed from the Kop. “Get it in the box, big yin! Put it in the mixer!” Corby Caledonian were on the verge of seeing their Wembley dream disappear. 1-0 down with 32 seconds left on the clock. The tartan hordes behind the goal in the world famous Spion Kop of Liverpool Football Club willed Thomas to belt the ball into the six yard box. Thomas responded, a big hoof and the ball landed at the feet of Joey Martin, the small stocky predator of instinct. The goal greedy king had once gorged himself to 55 goals in a season for United Counties League side Desborough Town. The blonde hit man whipped the ball back across the face of the Kop goal. Luck was on Caley’s side, a big defender stuck his boot out in a desperate attempt to clear, and sliced the ball right into the roof of the net. Appropriate somehow, even ironic! It was the Butcher’s Arms, after all! 1-1 and there was hardly time for a restart. The big feller from Barnsley had saved the Caley’s bacon!
The tartan hordes were delirious. “The big ham!” they laughed. Thousands had made the trek to the north west, many dressed in their native tartan. “Who shouted ‘get in the mixer?” queried Kenny Hughes. “Me” replied his mucker John Crawley, his voice struggling to pierce the deafening cacophony of delirium. “What the fuck’s the mixer?” “The box” shouted back Crawley, “I heard John Motson say it on Match of the Day!”
Hughes and Crawley, a comedy duo if ever there was one. Draped in the green and white of their beloved Celtic, they were well known for their ribald humour, and their Scotch Pie Man of the Match awards, ceremoniously presented to the winner in the Corby Town club bar after their games. They were now dreaming of a glorious day out at the cathedral of English football, Wembley. Duncan Thawley, the Butcher’s defender who gave the Corby side a lifeline, was a candidate for the Scotch Pie!
“Unbelievable” manager John Martin cried as he sat in the dugout, head still in hands. “My brother Joey, a prolific marksman in his own right, passed the ball on when I thought he was going to try and do something himself. There still looked nothing on until the big Butcher’s defender managed to somehow slice the ball into the roof of his net. I couldn’t believe it, I had been watching the clock tick over more than the match as the game wore on. I really thought we were going out, the linesman had already indicated to the ref that time was up.”
So extra time it was and once again, it failed to sort out a winner. John Martin; “It was back to penalties again, which we didn't really mind. The referee said to me ’you left it late’ at the final whistle. I told him, ‘Och, we love penalty shoot outs!” They did indeed, three of Caledonians five games on the way to the semi final had been settled by the nerve racking penalty shoot out. Could they do it again? Martin was beginning to think that fate was on his team's side.
The ‘Bravehearts’ behind the chosen goal taunted the Butchers boys as they stepped up to take their turn from the penalty spot, the loneliest spot in the world. Up went the kilts, bare arses shining in the sunlight. Tam Ferns in goal was acclaimed as one of the great penalty savers, reminiscent of the legendary Liverpool goalkeeper of yesteryear, Tommy Lawrence, the mighty ‘Flying Pig’. Tam had an uncanny knack of getting in the way of penalties. He would do his bit. And his teammates wouldn’t let him down. Nor his fans. In the Caley efforts went, a crescendo of noise raising the roof each time the ball sailed into the net. The Butcher’s boys were unnerved, stepping up like lambs to the slaughter. Tam saved one, then two, another went wide. Joey Martin stepped up for the crucial kick. It slipped past the forlorn Butchers’ keeper. The crowd went berserk, Martin hared off up the field, evading his galloping teammates hot in pursuit. It was bedlam. Wembley beckoned. London wouldn’t know what him ‘em!
Afterwards, the Royal Hotel and the Sandon, two pubs outside the famous Anfield stadium, were jam packed as the Corby contingent celebrated and went on the piss big time. Carlsberg had laid on a feast in the Anfield Lounge for the players and wives of both teams and a tour of Liverpool’s Trophy Room was also included along with as much free drink you could handle. Though very appreciative, John Martin asked a Carlsberg official politely if he would mind if the Corby party joined up with their pals in the pubs. Then the celebration really kicked off! “We did intend to stay and watch the other semi final between Poulton and Eastleigh. Until that last gasp penalty shoot out. We were too excited to sit around and watch another game of football. We just wanted to get kaylied!”
Anfield may have been devoid of Caledonian supporters for the second semi final but on hand to report on the match was the Wirral Globe.
‘Poulton Victoria booked their place at the 'Venue of Legends' with a superb 1-0 victory over Hants club Eastleigh Social. After a tight battle of nerves for the final Wembley place, Poulton confirmed they meant business with Ian Doran and Simmon Lewis both piling on the pressure to force Eastleigh into a defensive game. Both teams looked evenly matched until the 39th minute when man of the match Tim Foreman made it 1-0 to set up a dream final against Corby Caldedonian in the Carlsberg National Pub & Club Cup at Wembley Stadium on Saturday, May 10. Tim, a red hot Liverpool fan, clinched it with a sweet turn inside the box and a shot into the corner of the net. Afterwards, he was still pinching himself. "Unreal, I can't believe scoring at Anfield, and now were on our way to Wembley. It's a dream come true!" ‘
The success was hailed by Wirral Council Leader Dave Jackson, writing exclusively for the Globe.
‘I can't end this column today without sharing in the triumph of local amateur football team, Poulton Victoria, or the Poulton Vics as they’re more commonly known, who have actually made it to the hallowed turf of Wembley in the final of the Carlsberg Pub and Club Cup. The competition was open to all pub teams and established amateur football teams and is a very high standard. For a local Wirral team, with local players, to work their way through the different rounds to reach the final is a real achievement for them and for the West Cheshire League they play in. On Saturday, May 10, they play Corby Caledonian for the trophy in a noon kick-off before the FA Vase Final. As someone who once trained with the Poulton Vics when I ran a pub football team in the 60s (and no, I wasn’t actually good enough to play for them), I offer my congratulations. I’m sure the council will find a suitable way to honour their achievement.
A sad footnote to the Caledonian tie came with the news of a young Butcher’s supporter injured in an accident on the way home after the game.
Big hearted Corby Caley players sent a huge teddy bear to the boy who fell from the coach on the M62. Andre Kilner, 4, bounced along the hard shoulder for about 200m after falling out of the coach’s emergency door. He suffered a broken arm and a leg and a cut head. When the Corby players heard about Andre’s accident they bought the teddy bear to cheer him up. Manager John Martin; “as soon as we heard about the accident we rang the Butchers Arms and were told the youngster had been at the Anfield match. It was a bit of an upset on what was meant to be a party night at the club for reaching Wembley. He is very lucky to have escaped serious injury as the bus was travelling at 45 mph. The teddy bear has been sent to the Butchers Arms to be passed on to Andre when he comes home from hospital.”
News of Caley’s exploits spread far and wide, even to the House of Commons. During his maiden speech in the House, Phil Hope the new Labour MP for Corby, told the benches; “The Corby constituency is unique. As many Hon. Members may also know, Corby has a large Scots community. In many ways, the spirit of Scotland is present, strong and proud. Only last weekend, the Caledonian Club football team reached the Wembley cup final of the inter-club national football competition, putting Corby on the map in a big way.”
So that was Phil guaranteed a ticket then.
Wembley Way
The build up to the big day began when officials from the Football Association visited Corby to inform the Caley they were being allocated 500 free tickets. Dining at the Civic, John Martin told them bluntly it wasn't enough. “They asked us what the hard core of support was and I told them about 100, but we want around five or six thousand tickets. One guy nearly fell out of his chair laughing. This game has taken over the town I told them. Look at the banners everywhere. There was one draped right across George Street. They didn't have a scooby! The phone was never off the hook in the Darleydale club. In the end they told us we could have 750! They were soon snapped up by loyal fans and player’s families. For anybody else, tickets would be on sale on the Wembley gates on the day at £10 each.”
With the tie capturing the town’s imagination, news came through that a Corby man exiled in Australia was making his way home especially for the game. ‘A football crazy father and son have spent £2,000 and travelled halfway round the world to watch the Caley team at Wembley. Roger Johnson, known as Jonah to his friends, and his son Darren have travelled from Perth in Australia for the Carlsberg Cup Final. Mr Johnson, 53, who emigrated with his family in 1976 said an old friend had faxed him to say the Caledonian Club team had won through to Wembley and they were eager to come back for the match. “I try to get back to Corby when there is a special event - and this is one of them.” Roger told the Evening Telegraph. Darren who was 10 when they emigrated said “I love football and support Perth Glory. Corby is my birthplace so this match will be something special.” The Johnsons are staying with Roger’s old schoolfriend Howard Burdett and plan to fly back in two weeks.“Ten of us are travelling to the match” said Howard, “and it’s great to see Roger and Darren here. We will have a great time.”
Excitement was ramping up to overdrive. “hundreds of pounds have been pouring in to help us meet with expenses” said committeeman Dave Erwin, “we have been overwhelmed. We just want to reward everyone’s efforts by bringing home the cup.” The list of sponsors included Corby Council for a civic reception and an open top bus for a tour of the town. British Steel for boots. Weldon Plant for thermal tracksuits. Sportsworld have contributed squad tracksuits. Hallmark Recruitment - £200. Brian Brogan Plant Hire and Groundworks - £200. Solway Foods - £200. Spencers Auctioneers - £50. DuBois - £200. Secure Employment - cash. Things Fabric Printers, London with 500 T-Shirts. Declon - 500 foam gloves. Brian Goodyear Bookmakers - £100. Corby Canvas - two banners. Mr Howie - £50.
The same scenario was happening on Merseyside too with The Wirral Globe promoting a ‘Be a Wembley mascot competition’.
‘How do you fancy sitting in the Royal Box at Wembley to see crack Wirral club Poulton Victoria take on Northamptonshire club Corby Caledonian in the final of the Carlsberg Pub Cup on Saturday, May 10? That is the highlight of a super prize to be won in a simple-to-enter contest organised by the Globe in conjunction with Carlsberg.
We are looking for an Alternative Mascot to help bring Vics luck when they play beneath the shadow of the famous twin towers on the biggest day in the club's history.
All you have to do is tell us, in no more than 50 words, why you would be the ideal Alternative Mascot. You, or the person you nominate, may or may not be a keen supporter of the Carlsberg West Cheshire League champions; you could be longing just to see Wembley; you may never have seen a football match; you may have just come out of hospital; whatever the reason, tell us about it.
The winner, and his/her guest, will travel to London as guests of Carlsberg, have their picture taken at Wembley with the team, watch the match from the famous Royal Box - and receive a case of Carlsberg lager. Closing date for entries is Tuesday (May 6th). Entries, on a postcard or piece of paper, should be sent to: Wembley Mascot Contest, The Sports Editor, Wirral Globe, Globe House, Catherine Street, Birkenhead, Wirral L41 6HW.
Please, do remember to put your own name and address and, if possible, a daytime telephone number. Good luck! At least 1,000 supporters will be travelling from Wirral to Wembley. Corby are hoping to have up to 10,000 fans in the famous stadium (kick-off 12 noon).
Four supporters' coaches will depart Poulton Victoria Social Club at 6am on the day. Cost is £10 return, inclusive of ticket (while supplies last).
Tickets (£5, £10 and £15) will be on sale on match day at Wembley Stadium.’
‘Poulton Victoria - winners for the second successive year of the Carlsberg West Cheshire League Division One Championship and for the second time in three seasons the coveted Cheshire Amateur Cup - step out at Wembley on Saturday on what will be the greatest day of their footballing lives.
Beneath the famous twin towers, Vics face Kettering Sunday League club Corby Caledonian in the national final of the Carlsberg Pub Cup.
Some 1,200 people are travelling from Wirral to support the Wallasey club and although they will certainly be outnumbered - Corby have sold nearly 3,000 tickets - they will not be outshouted, especially if skipper Paul Lacy leads his all-conquering side up the famous steps to the royal box to collect the magnificent trophy!
The fairytale begins on Friday for manager Alvin McDonald and his talented team of part-timers, who boast among their ranks a carpenter, electrician, a printer, carpet fitter, two postmen, a master mason and an engineer. They travel by luxury coach to London on Friday, staying overnight in a top city hotel and, after the match, attend a banquet at the Cafe Royal as guests of Carlsberg.
Vics' achievement in reaching a Wembley cup final has caught the imagination locally. George Cooper, secretary of Poulton Victoria Sports and Social Club in Poulton Bridge Road, Wallasey, has been besieged with requests for tickets and ‘good luck’ messages.
The Carlsberg Pub Cup Final precedes the FA Vase Final, which kicks off at 3pm and this year is an all-North East affair - so there could be some Tyneside voices cheering Vics on, too!
Vics, though, will not be wearing their normal all-blue strip - both finalists will wear kit specially ordered by the sponsors and Vics, who lost the toss to occupy the home team dressing room, will be dressed in yellow.
Win or lose, Vics are assured of heroes' return to Wirral - a civic reception is being arranged in their honour by Wirral Borough Council and is due to be held at Wallasey Town Hall next Friday (May 16).’
Ray Condliffe, Press Officer for the Carlsberg West Cheshire League pinned his colours to the Poulton flag;
‘Although entering the Carlsberg Pub Cup under the name of Poulton Victoria Social Club, it is, of course, the football section of the club that will be treading the Wembley turf. Poulton Victoria FC became members of the West Cheshire League in 1964 and a move in 1972 to their present home at Victoria Park triggered off a period of success which established Vics in the forefront of West Cheshire football.
A period of relatively little achievement in the '80s and early '90s began to change on the arrival of Alvin McDonald as manager in 1992. Backed by an extremely efficient and hard working committee, Alvin began to mould a side that made the breakthrough in collecting silverware when lifting the Wirral Senior Cup in 1994. Twelve months later, success spread from District to County level with the winning of the prestigious Cheshire Amateur Cup. Last season, the club became champions of both Divisions and this year's retention of the Division One title, along with their regaining of the Cheshire Amateur Cup, is an impressive prelude to their Wembley visit.
It was pleasing to note the large number of representatives of other Carlsberg West Cheshire League clubs cheering Vics on in their semi-final at Anfield. Indeed, Alvin and his team can be assured that the thoughts and good wishes of the whole League, coincidentally also sponsored by Carlsberg, are with them on their great day.’
Back in Corby the buzz was reaching fever pitch proportions with a series of Evening Telegraph exclusives.
‘Hundreds of workers are Wembley bound to show their support for colleagues who have become soccer heroes. At least 20 firms have arranged coaches to take staff to see Corby Caledonian Club's team play at Wembley.
DuBois, the plastics company in Princewood Road has booked two coaches to take 150 workers to support Andy Morrison and Tam Ferns who work for the firm. Managing Director Anthony Fraser said “we are always proud of our sportsmen and women at the firm and we shall be out in force to offer moral support on the big day”.
Patrick Hamill, assistant unit controller at Oxford University Press is organising a 52 seater coach for staff to support Jamie Gilsenan. “We took a coach to the semi final at Anfield and there was a great atmosphere. May 10 is going to be a great day out for all the staff and it adds excitement when someone you work with is involved.” Ray Stanton, partner of Corby Windscreens hopes too organise transport for striker Steve Wilkinson’s colleagues. “We love football and are keeping our fingers crossed Steve does well. It will be great to see him in action.”
Corby Caley club managing director Andy MacFarlane said about 20 coaches have already been organised for the big day. “People just keep calling to ask about tickets. The interest has been phenomenal. The British Legion, Solway Foods and the Ex Servciceman’s Club have all arranged coaches to take fans to the match.”
The E.T. was lapping up the excitement - and a keen boost in sales. Meet Corby Caledonian, ‘the penalty shoot-out kings’ they told its readers.
‘Corby Caledonian FC play in the Kettering Sunday League at Corby’s West Glebe Park. Team colours:- All green. Sponsor:- Corby Caledonian. They have their own tartan barmy braveheart army of 1,500 fans - and nearly twice that number will be cheering them on at Wembley! Corby’s danger men will be winger Jamie Gilsenan and strikers Graham Archer and Joe Martin.
Caledonian have won three of their qualifying matches on penalty shoot-outs on their way to Wembley, due chiefly to goalkeeper Tam Ferns’ remarkable agility, the David Seaman of the side has saved no fewer than six spot-kicks in three rounds! Corby enjoyed a dramatic victory in the Anfield semi-final against Yorkshire club Butchers Arms with a dramatic equaliser deep into injury time which forced a penalty shoot out.’
More publicity came when John Martin was contacted by Ronnie Strickland, singer with local punk band Skirt Patrol; "When you going to record your Wembley song?" Ronnie asked his old friend.
“Song?” ”Yeah every team that goes to Wembley make a record!"
John; “And we all ended up in Premier Studios in Occupation Road to sing the fans's anthem, 'Caley's on the march.' Somehow GMTV heard about it and got in touch. They wanted to film the team and supporters singing down at the Welfare ground. It was all set up then at the last minute they pulled it because some girl went and gave birth to sextuplets! That was that!"
Ronnie: "We did a cover of Sham 69's hit 'Hurry Up Harry' and changed the words to suit Caley. It was great fun in the studio with all the players singing along with Skirt Patrol. The CD was on the jukebox in the Caley. Anglia News heard about the exploits of the football team and came over to Corby to film the players during training, and used the song in the background! That's our claim to fame!!"
Dave Erwin, talking on the eve of the game from Corby’s Stakis Hotel admitted they had been overwhelmed by the response from the town. “We are taking 14 coaches from the club alone and I understand there are around 50 other coaches from various organisations and businesses in the town. We just hope we can to reward everyone's efforts by bringing home the cup."
As part of the Carlsberg plan, former Spurs and Northern Ireland goalkeeper Pat Jennings paid the Caley a visit to pass on some wisdom and undoubted experience. When asked by Northants Television presenter and poet Chuck Middleton what advice Jennings had passed on to him, Tam Ferns told Chuck, “He told me never to get the first round in!”
Caley were preparing for Wembley with a spell in the Stakis Hotel health club and a champagne reception in the Millar's Bar before setting off for London early next morning. Chuck the Poet interviewed the players in his own inimitable style, at the dining table, on the treadmill, and in the bath - where he ended up being Chucked fully clothed into the swimming pool. Chuck took in great spirit, popping up in the water with his microphone still in hand - "this is Chuck Middleton, reporting for Northants TV, from the depths of the Millar's Bar Swimming Pool."
Caley's confidence was given a boost when Jamie Gilsenan's sister, studying at Manchester University, had been on a spying mission to seek out information and watch Poulton Victoria train during the week. She concluded; ‘None of the players appear to inhabit the club’ - which would become more apparent after the Wembley final when the boys from Caley phoned the Paulton club to give them one final rendition of Caley's Song. There was nobody from the team there! - ‘Most of them may play a decent standard of football’ sis added, ‘but they weren't any great shakes.’
Caley pen-pics;
Tam Ferns. 30. Known as the Cat, a Rangers and Man Utd supporter. A forklift driver at DuBois, he enjoys golf and diving and is the team's penalty saving hero.
Andy Morrison. 30. Right back. A foreman at DuBois and is Tam's boss. His Saturday team is S&L and he supports Man Utd. His ambition is to win the lottery.
Adam Kirk 22 Left back from Kettering. Gets stick for being a 'foreigner.' Noticeable on pitch for his Paul Gascoinge peroxide hair cut. A student and supports Liverpool. His favourite moment of the cup run was visiting Anfield's trophy room. Adam Kirk was only outsider in team. "We used to give him some terrible stick. He was only allowed to play for the Caley if he could drink ten pints of lager!"
Nicky Ellis 31. Centre Half and captain. Plays for Weldon on Saturdays. A roofer by trade.
Colin McGinlay 29. Midfielder known as Gash by his teammates for his tough tackling. Plays for Strip Mills on Saturday and is a Celtic fan. Assistant manager at the Caledonian Club.
Ged Gribben 24. Ged plays for Desborough. An apprentice welder in Northampton and enjoys all sports. Has been out most of season with hamstring trouble and will play at Wembley in a plaster cast after recently injuring his arm.
Jamie Gilsenan 21. Right wing plays for Desborough. Supports Man Utd and is a factory worker at Oxford Press. Enjoys watching films and videos.
Ian Jaffrey 30. Known as Jaffs and is a Man Utd supporter. A lorry driver and he says he wants to retire rich. Plays for Weldon.
Steve Wilkinson 26 A windscreen technician at Corby Windscreens. Enjoys golf, fishing and diving. Steve missed out on a Wembley final with Raunds Town in the FA Vase two seasons ago. He says he used to drive to work agonising on missing out but it is all behind him now.
Graeme Archer 27. Plays for Desborough, his highlight so far was playing at Anfield. His worst injury was an Achilles Tendon. A forklift driver for Corby Bottlers.
Joey Martin 33. Known as Baby Face in the dressing room and plays for Cottingham. A fork lift driver at Quebecor.
Mick Ward 30. No fixed address. Known as the Judge and supports Man Utd. Works for Brian Brogan Plant Hire.
Gary Thomas 36. Oldest player and also turns out for Strip Mills. A Liverpool fan who works for Fairline Boats. Says he's played at Wolves' Molinuex ground in the past but it doesn't compare with playing at Anfield.
Gary Kennedy 21. Had trials with his favourite team Rangers as a youngster. He also missed out on a YTS place with Premiership club Derby County. Plays for Desborough. Hobbies include golf and snooker.
Matt Forster 22. Played for Corby Town last year against Stamford Town when he had bruising encounter with ex Olympic star Daley Thompson. He came off worst in the pair's first challenge for the ball and had to miss the rest of the match. A Leeds fan.
Fran O'Connor 32. Plays for Strip Mills. Known as Beaky by his teammates. Also works at Fairline Boats.
It was pointed out to John Martin that if he played a part in the game, he and Joey would be only the fifth set of brothers to play in a Wembley Cup Final. Being truthfully honest with himself, he couldn't take the chance. "I couldn't play really. I was still not fully recovered from a broken ankle I had the year before. It would have been grossly unfair to pick myself. It was interesting though. It set us all thinking as to who the other four sets of brothers were. The Greenhoffs and Nevilles for Man Utd, the Charltons for England and that was all we could think of. Somebody said the Robledo brothers for Newcastle in the 50s but we weren't sure.” (Ted and George Robledo both played in the 1952 Cup Final for Newcastle against Arsenal. Newcastle won 1-0).
Whatever, John and Joey's parents were naturally thrilled. Joe Senior and Betty who brought their young family to Corby from Edinburgh in 1959 beamed with pride as their offspring set out on their course for history. "Having two sons involved in a Wembley cup final is something most soccer mad fathers can only dream of."
John Martin admitted to having sleepless nights in deciding who to pick for the biggest match of the players careers. "I told the players who was in the team on the bus going to Wembley. It was a hard decision telling some of the boys they'd be starting on the bench. Andy Morrison took it particularly hard. It was a pity but I tried to point out it was a thankless task and I couldn't win whoever I picked or left out. Both Poulton and ourselves had asked if it was possible for us to use all five substitutes for the game but the FA refused. The competition was being run under strict FA rules. Which was churlish and silly but typical! My reasoning behind the selection was simply that I knew Poulton's back four were big guys and slow on the turn. I figured if we played our wee guys up front, we would be too fast for them. Also we needed some guys who could hold the ball up in midfield before launching the attacks. In Graeme Archer we had one of the best midfielders in the county. I thought it gave us our best chance. When Graeme tore a muscle in his groin after just seven minutes, my plan went pear shaped. It was heartbreaking for Arch. One opportunity to play at the Twin Towers and it only lasts seven minutes! Fran 'Big Beaky' went on. I thought Gary Kennedy was more mobile than Andy Morrison, Colin 'Gash' McGinlay a better passer of the ball than Jaffrey though Ian was arguably more industrious.”
John’s team talk was a repeat and a reminder of what he told his players at Anfield. “I was struggling to think of something to say and ended up blurting out ‘They'll be naming streets after you!’ again. Adding for good measure, ‘The whole town is coming to see you’.
On our way we pulled up at some traffic lights, must have been three or four miles from Wembley. There was an off licence on the corner and 30 or 40 guys outside, all with kilts on. It took us by surprise at first, then we saw the carry outs - guys with packs of beer, 24 can size, on their shoulders. Everyone cracked up. The Greyhound pub, down from Wembley Way was jam packed with the tartan hordes, all singing. Disappointing was having to change into our kits in portacabins outside Wembley Arena. Due to the FA Vase finalists getting priority. (Whitby beat North Ferriby 3-0).
We then drove up to the big gates by the twin towers to find around 2000 fans waiting for us. It was impossible not to take in the history of the place, thinking of all the great teams arriving here just as we were doing, amazing.”
Opponents Poulton Victoria included a carpet fitter, master mason, postman and a printer. They had matched Caley's achievements for the season by winning their own league and cup competitions. Caley were still pushing for glory in the Kettering Sunday League and Simon Thornton League Cup. Founded in 1935 Poulton played at Victoria Park, Wallasey - a former allotment site. (How many times was the pitch called a cabbage patch I wondered). They disbanded during the second world war and reformed in 1954 and had since won various Cheshire and Wirral cups, their highlight playing Conference Champions Macclesfield in the Cheshire Senior Cup in 1972. Manager Alvin McDonald was finding it hard to believe he was soon to be treading the famous turf. "I watched the England v Georgia game the other night and I thought to myself. God I'll be leading Vic out at Wembley in a weeks time!"
Dave Erwin was feeling both excited and apprehensive; "I was amazed our players weren't frightened by Anfield when they played there, but they were cool and confident. At Wembley I hoped they would get into their stride and get rid of the nerves when they went out for a walkabout. Walking out to get a feel of the place made me think of the last time I'd been to Wembley, for the 2000 England v Scotland game when Gazza scored his amazing goal and McAllister missed a penalty for Scotland. Looking from the stand, the goal looked massive and I remember thinking, how could anybody miss a penalty from twelve yards. I walked up to the goal and the memories came flooding back. I suddenly realised what McAllister had to face.The thought of taking a penalty made me shudder! If I had to come on and was asked to take one, I think I'd have bottled it! The turf was springy. A lot has been said over the years about the Wembley turf. It was quite long and when I put my hand on it, real sort of soft.”
As the teams lined up in the tunnel, John Martin admitted his hairs stood up on his neck. Paulton's goalkeeper Steve Skudipi later lavished praise on the tartan hordes; ‘What support! We never had any support, they made it for us as well. Me and a couple of the lads were that nervous we started singing the Corby song 'the Caley 's here' as well!"
Caledonian's dream of lifting the cup was dented early when the experienced influential midfielder Graeme Archer suffered his injury. On the wide open spaces of Wembley, Archer would have excelled and it was a crushing blow for the Corby side. Poulton had the better in the opening stages without really troubling the Caley defence. With Archer limping off it left Joey Martin far too often isolated up front. As a consequence when they did get the ball fired into potentially dangerous positions they inevitably lost possession. Poulton’s Dave Hurley drilled a shot wide of Ferns' right hand post while Lewis blasted over the top when a long ball from deep put him in the clear. As the half wore on Caledonian started to come into the game with Colin McGinlay's low shot saved by the keeper.
Martin produced a weak shot after good work by Nicky Ellis and O’Connor. Steve Wilkinson had a go but his tame shot was easily gathered by Steve Skupidi when Jamie Gilsenan was far better positioned wide on the right hand angle of the box. At half time it was still all level, 0-0.
Feeling parched, one fan, Dave Stark, who took his 82 year old mother in law to the game, nipped out at half time to get her a hot dog and an orange juice. On his way back he was stopped by stewards who refused him entry back into the arena. Raging, Dave told them; "I don't think she's going to knock anybody out with a bloody hot dog!"
Poulton pressed forward from the start of the second half. Ferns pushed a shot from Dave Hurley wide while Wilkinson got in the way of Galloway's goal bound effort. Caley hit back with Gary Kennedy's quickly taken free kick turned aside by the diving Skupidi and then he drove into the side netting from a good position. Gilsenan came closest to breaking the deadlock after 63 minutes after a surging run from midfield found the winger free on the right. But with his low angled shot destined for the net Mike Tabiner arrived right on schedule to clear off the line.
Then came an abrupt end for Caley’s ambitions when two goals in the space of five minutes sentenced them to defeat. Caley had been in contention in terms of commitment as they battled to stay in touch with a Poulton Victoria side who always held the edge in terms of skill. But in the 72nd minute Dave Galloway turned quite superbly in the box to rifle a left foot shot past the helpless Tam Ferns. Three minutes later, Stuart Jones lined himself up for a shot from fully 30 yards out - and Ferns was flat footed as the sub quite deliberately blasted a shot into the top corner for the most unexpected finish. Simon Lewis made it sure for the Merseysiders when he too left the Caledonian defence for dead and Ferns was again left floundering. Joey Martin, who had worked tirelessly up front with little support, side footed home from Andy Morrison's left wing cross to give the scoreline some respectability but it was a case of too little, too late. 1-3.
Teams.
Caley; Tam Ferns, Gary Kennedy, Adam Kirk, Gary Thomas, Nicky Ellis, Ged Gribben, Jamie Gilsenan, Colin McGinlay (sub Forster 51) Joey Martin, Graeme Archer (sub Fran O'Connor 12), Steve Wilkinson (sub Andy Morrison 77).
Poulton; Steve Skupidi, Mike Tabiner, Hughes (sub Glanville71), Dave Hurley, Jones, Kelly, Lacey, Ian Doran (sub Price 71) Simon Lewis, Tim Foreman (sub Stuart Jones 63), Dave Galloway. Referee; Roger Milford (Gloucester).
Reporting for The Times was journalist, Lynne Truss.
‘Most football cliches sound quite good the first time you hear them. "This is our cup final" I remember the Chesterfield crowds declaring on the day of their momentous semi final at Old Trafford. And I thought "Yes I can see that. You mean this is your big day, don't you? But ah your surface fatalism cannot disguise the tremendous pluck beneath!
But as the weeks have passed, I have somehow lost my admiration for this chestnut. It transpires that all football managers refer to their semi finals in these terms. Last weekend Bryan Robson even said "this is our cup final." about Middlesborough's crucial league match against Leeds United - an absurdly illogical remark because (as we all know), he's actually got a a cup final, and its tomorrow. (Chelsea 2 Middlesbrough 0)
So how refreshing, last saturday to see a proper cup final without any of this nonsense attached. At Wembley, it was, the Carlsberg Pub Cup, played between Poulton Victoria and Corby Caledonian. It was a squally gritty day: flattened beer cans clattered down the desecrated approaches to the stadium, the tiny crowd looked chill damp and lonely. Yet it was a proud occasion for non league football nevertheless. It was also a cruel disappointment for anyone (like me), expecting a game between beer bellied, gasping, unfit teams called Real Ale Madrid running about with borrowed shorts at half mast.
Because these guys meant business. They wore very smart (not to say beautiful) kit - Poulton in an all canary yellow, Corby in all grass green. Their supporters turned out in considerable force (about 4000) and Poulton won 3-1 after a very exciting second half that included an astonishing goal from a free kick by Stuart Jones, a printer by day with a look of David Beckham.
Long range goals are his speciality, his team mates say he gets nosebleeds in the six yard box. Hence his confidence in piercing the Corby wall. If you are familiar with Stan Mortensen's goal from a free kick in the 1953 Blackpool v Bolton Cup Final, well - Stuart Jones goal was just like that.
Is Corby where they make trouser presses? That's the good thing about football. It encourages geographical speculation. Poulton turns out to be on Merseyside where the team has won the West Cheshire League this season, thus making their success on Saturday a case of 'winning the double.'
No irony undercuts this phrase because none is appropriate. At their Victoria Park ground they have already erected floodlights and are considering the big leap into non league, (I don't really understand this) which will entail installing turnstyles and paying the players. They could then enter the FA Carlsberg Vase. They might even get a sponsor. I try not to think too hard about the so called pyramid of football. The trouble is, its becoming increasingly clear to me that the broad base of the football pyramid is actually the same size as the ground area of the United Kingdom.
This is a scary thought, obviously. Beneath the four visible divisions, organised football just spreads out far, wide and vigorously like a volcanic lava, knocking over tall buildings in its path.
Call me paranoid, but look out, football is seeping under your front door! One day you will come home from work and find a small pets league has been formed in your living room!
The football pyramid is phenomenal, very squat and its hard work climbing it. For a pub team like Poulton to dream of playing on the giddy slopes of the Vauxhall Conference is like me dreaming I'm Demi Moore. Yet they have done brilliantly to win the 'double'. They have beaten a lot of other people on the way. So well done Poulton. and well done Corby Caledonian.
Identifying the underdog on Saturday was easy because Corby brought an amazing 3000 fans, including a local reporter (Chuck Middleton) who lowered the tone of the press box by yelling "Handball!!" and jumping out of his seat. His is not the sort of behaviour you expect in a Wembley press box, where the press is inscrutable, incorruptible and engrossed in masticating a big cheese roll supplied by the management. Anyway with all this Corby support, naturally my sympathies swung to the other side. Although Corby's top goalscorer Joey Martin, was outstanding. And I must admit I have nothing against the trouser press, per se.
I just hope someone was videoing the game for the lads to watch at home afterwards. In the first half on Saturday the chance of a good game seemed to elude both teams altogether. And Poultons plausible manager Alvin McDonald had to remind his boys not to waste the occasion.
And so, in the space of ten minutes in the second half, they scored three goals - one from Dave "One chance" Galloway. the second from Stuart (Mortensen) Jones and the third from Simon (no nickname) Lewis. And suddenly it was all over. They walked, grinning up the famous steps to collect their trophy. Their wives took snaps. And it was magic.
All of which puts Bryan Robson's problems in perspective. As Hamlet says; (how all occasions do deform against you), Bryan.
There is this enormous pyramid, you see, right at the very top there's a team with a 50 50 chance of winning the F A Cup. but they are smarting from their regrettable slide down to -ooh -21st place.
A full inch from the summit of a pyramid the size of the country. Not that's it all tragic in its way. When Middlesborough failed to beat Leeds on Sunday. I was grief stricken I sat on the floor like Junhiho with my head in my hands and wrestled with the question "Why?"
I just hope last Sunday wasn't Middlesbrough’s cup final. Literally because I'm going to the real one tomorrow.’
And so the adventure was over, but what a run it had been. Unbelievable for the lads who played their part on and off the pitch. John Martin reflected;
"Carlsberg had paid to put us all up for two nights in the Plaza Hotel, a five star job. There was also a post match reception at the Cafe Royal. The Bootleg Beatles and Australian comic 'Johnno' was on who endeared himself to the Corby contingent by stating they were 'the best dressed team even though they didn't win!'
On the way to the Cafe Royal, our bus passed Radio One DJ Chris Evans in the street. Course, the cheers and whistles started and then the whole bus did a 'moony' to him. He didn't have a clue who or what we were, but still mentioned it on his radio show next day! "Some mad Jocks”. Outside the Cafe, a crowd of Japs were congregated and started taking photographs of us, they didn't have a clue who we were either!"
Graham Kelly, FA Secretary was also in attendance. "Never heard of Corby” he said, which must have been a lie, as he only lives around 20 odd miles away from Corby! Kenny Hughes, our number one fan was also invited, which wasn't a great idea with all the free booze! What Kelly made of him I don't know. Kenny sounded as if he gargled with gravel with his rasping Scottish accent.
Disappointing was a Civic reception promised by the council which never materialised. The Willow Room had been designated for the 'bash' with all the families of those involved invited. That was a bit of a downer. Dave Erwin phoned up to enquire about what was happening and was told 'we'll make it up to you - we'll give you a free pitch in the West Glebe for the year!' He was told 'the money's been spent on something else!'
The tour of the town went ahead on the Sunday afternoon though and what a day that was, people were standing on every street corner cheering the players. The cop cars even had Scotland banners on them! The Pluto, one of the town's most notorious pubs had banners out welcoming us home. The whole town seemed to forget their petty differences to join in the fun. The procession started at 3pm from the Civic Centre, went down Turner Road, Gainsborough Road, Greenhill Rise, Beanfield Avenue, Kingsthorpe Avenue, Fotheringay Road, Willowbrook Road, Rockingham Road, Occupation Road and Studfall Avenue, ending in the Caledonian Club. Police urged everyone to enjoy themselves but not to follow the bus and block up the roads. I'm pleased to say there was no reports of any misdemeanours or anything along the way."
Goalscorer Joey Martin spoke for them all, saying "we will never forget this, we’ll be able to tell our children and grandchildren we played at Wembley."
The following week it was back to reality with Caledonian playing the Cardigan Arms in the Simon Thornton League Cup and then Oddysey at Weekley Glebe Park Kettering in their last league game. They only needed a point to win the championship.
