The Road to Bangkok.
Looking for a more adventurous holiday? Something different to just sitting on your backside on a sun drenched beach with a book and a glass of Sangria? Thailand could be your answer. Programmes on the Sky TV channels might put some off visiting this little corner of the Far East, the drug dens, prostitution, overcrowding. Not an entirely enticing advert but if you look beyond the sleaze one can have a truly memorable holiday, as Clive Smith and his family discovered.
'Everyone has heard of the infamous Bangkok Hilton but there are far and away more preferable places to stay in. Our destination was the small island of Khoh Samet, situated in the south of Thailand, initiating an overnight stop in Bangkok. The flight from Manchester Ringway with Etihad Airways, voted the world's best airline in 2010 and 2011 took in total a cool 14 hours. Long haul isn't everyone's bag but if you're well prepared, i.e. Ipod, books, magazines, plus the in-flight TV entertainment, the time soon flies by.
The Ramada Hotel was our abode on the first night, surprisingly quiet, small but quaint with a private garden and swimming pool area. Hard to believe it was right in the middle of the bustling city of Bangkok where just around the corner a railway line cut through the heart of the city with people living in dwellings literally just feet away from the tracks! No fences or barriers. Bangkok can be claustrophobic. Bustling, congested, the population stands at 12 million people and a glance around the back streets away from the hotels reveals a plethora of shanty like dwellings where the local inhabitants live. There’s no fear of being harassed by drug dealers - as is the perception - unless you're looking for some! You get more harassment off the Tuc Tuc Taxi drivers looking for fares. Though it has to be said, the three wheel glorified tricycles are ideal for nipping through the gridlocked City streets.
The Ramada proved to be an ideal respite before a four hour journey by taxi to Khoh Samet. Daunting at the outset the positive side of the taxi ride, a minibus by comparison to the Tuc Tuc, was the opportunity to see more of the country, the outer suburbs of Bangkok, the various villages en route. Somewhat alarmingly, to reach the island, the taxi dropped us off by a marina where a speedboat was hired to finish the trip. Just enough room for six passengers and luggage, the speed boat took around 15 minutes to reach the island and then dispatched all of us into the sea where we had to wade through the surf and onto the beach. Bizarre to say the least. I half expected to see Jeremy Beadle waiting for us! It was patently obvious that the Health and Safety merchants haven't reached this part of Asia yet.
Khoh Samet is a secluded small island with modern luxury holiday chalets and wonderful white sandy beaches. Hospitality was first class, as was the food. A range of Thai Curries and chicken meals cooked in the spicy flavours of the East washed down with wine or the local beer called Chang who are the sponsors for Everton F.C as it happens, satisfied even the most hardened traveller, and my scouser son-law Nick!
Evening meals on the beach with the aromatic smell of barbecued fish or steak wafting around was something else you don't often see back home.
The most surprising thing about Thailand is how cheap everything appears to be. Ten days on the island and two nights in two of the best hotels in Bangkok cost just £450. Meals and drinks are ridiculously cheap.
The obligatory day trip was indulged and a trip to a fish farm ensued which was an alarming experience. There are no roads on the island and a 'taxi' which turned out to be a pick-up truck drove six of us over a landscape that would have proved arduous for a lunar module. Bumps and dips all along the three mile trek which took around half an hour was just the start. Dropped off by the side of the road, what was considered a ferry to transfer our party over turned out to be a wooden pallet tied on top of a couple of oil drums! Unbelievable. Hairy as well! A rope attached from the fish farm built on stilts a few hundred yards into the ocean was tied to a tree next to the 'taxi rank' and the ferry driver levered everybody over. To enter the farm meant clambering up a ten foot steel ladder attached to the side. Not as easy as it sounds with the pallet wobbling all over the place as each member climbed off. Second last to leave the pallet, clinging for my life with both hands on the ladder, I nearly came a cropper as the pallet went one way and I the other leaving me literally horizontal and staring down into the murky sea! Not exactly known for my prowess on the breast stroke, well not as regards my swimming anyway, I was faced with a dilemma. Let go with my hands - or my feet. There was no way I was going for a swim so I dragged my feet off the pallet, and my legs crashed into the side of the ladder leaving me with cuts and bruises as a memento. Panic over. The girls' cries and tension exchanged for convulsions of laughter, I shakily climbed the steep ladder to sanctuary and a rest on the wooden floor. To view the various exhibits, turtles, sharks etc planks a foot wide were provided to straddle along in between the tanks. One look at the sharks eyeing you up as the next meal if you fell in was sobering, leaving me pondering 'who's great idea was this?'
Back on dry land, beach entertainment included a squad of youngsters doing the rounds every night throwing and twirling flaming batons around, catching and eating them whilst you got tucked into your evening meal. Highly entertaining but after three or four nights, tedious. Especially when they came round with the buckets for payment!
Thai Kick Boxing in a ring assembled on the beach was something else you don't see everyday and reminded one of how far away from home you were. Kids aged as young as eight or nine, kicking and punching lumps out of each other for the amusement of the baying locals as well as the holidaymakers was not to everyone's taste. However if this is their culture who are we to criticise?
For those who enjoy a massage, there is ample opportunity to stretch out on the sun lounger and think of England as a pretty Thai girl tenderises your feet and aching muscles. Very satisfying and what better way to chill out at the end of the day, than under a clear starlit sky, squatting on the rocks with a Bacardi and Coke, listening to the sounds of Bob Marley and Aretha Franklin emanating from the beach bars? Sublime.
It all added up to a very different type of holiday from that in a resort in the Mediterranean or a week on the balmy North Sea coastline of Ingoldmells. And not a Bingo stall in sight!
Returning to Bangkok for a day and one final night, spent in the Baiyoke Hotel which boasts to be the tallest building in Thailand was perfect. 84 floors up offers a spectacular panoramic view of the city. For those with a nervous disposition it is weird to be ascending in an elevator and clocking each floor as it rises. Doesn't do to let the imagination run wild.
The reception area, twelve floors up was less endearing, resembling Piccadilly Tube Station during rush hour. Frenetic and noisy. Chaotic. For golf bores, a driving range is situated on the 23rd floor with a dining area alongside offering a wide variety of bar meals and drink. Very relaxing.
Bangkok is a city that never goes to sleep, densely overcrowded and at night looking down from our room on the 35th floor you realised why so many people ride and walk around with masks covering their faces. The smog lies over the city like a cloud.
Whilst in Bangkok a river trip is essential where the views of the ancient palaces, monuments and temples are splendid. Another eye opener is the canoes with local women sidling up alongside the barges to sell their wares of fruit, drink and vegetables. A tourist attraction described as a floating market. You don't get that on the Thames. Unique.
All in all, Thailand is well recommended for those looking for something just a little bit more offbeat and different!
